The Dangerous Art of Blending In by Angelo Surmelis

The Dangerous Art of Blending In by Angelo Surmelis
My rating: 5 of 5 stars

This was gut-wrenching. I find stories of parental abuse to be very disturbing, but I also can't stop reading them once I get started, at least not until I know whether or not the child survives and/or escapes it.

This is also a story of friendship and first love and finding your voice in the worst of circumstances. There are brief flashes of gorgeousness between all the painful moments, and those moments are so hopeful that it pulls you through the rough patches.

Pages: 336

Steel Brothers Saga

Obsession by Helen Hardt
My rating: 5 of 5 stars

I’m completely hooked and need more now!!

288 Pages

View all my reviews


Possession by Helen Hardt
My rating: 5 of 5 stars

So, I was thinking that once I got the end of Talon and Jade's story I would have the answers that I needed... well that didn't happen.. I am hooked!!

288 Pages

View all my reviews

Melt by Helen Hardt
My rating: 5 of 5 stars

Jonah and Melanie... Yes!!

288 Pages

View all my reviews


Burn by Helen Hardt
My rating: 5 of 5 stars

Twists and turns... this series is full of them!!!

288 Pages

View all my reviews


Surrender by Helen Hardt
My rating: 5 of 5 stars

This series is my newest addiction..... I need answers.  I really can't say much about these series without giving away spoilers... So I was just say that I am hooked and this series is full of ups and downs... one minute you are swooning, than shocked of how sick people are and than jaw dropped from shocking new developments.

288 Pages

View all my reviews

It Ends with Us by Colleen Hoover

It Ends with Us by Colleen Hoover
My rating: 5 of 5 stars

#BecRereads2018

*#&^*&@^*!!

~$*%(@&%#*!(*#&*%$@!

Every. Time. This just guts me. I have a brutal headache. I've been emotionally distressed all day, and I just cried my eyes out, and yet there's such a layer of raw truth in this book that even after it completely breaks me down, I just want to pick it back up and start again at the beginning.

If I want to read Colleen Hoover over and over again for fun, I'd run straight to UGLY LOVE, but when I want to read her best book, the one that she put the most of herself in and that because of that it's so painfully honest and raw that it's like having my skin scratched off with sandpaper while I read, then it's this book.

And the author's note at the end of the book is quite frankly the best and most upsetting part.

Book 321 read in 2018

Pages: 376

PREVIOUS REVIEW:
*expletives redacted*

I had no idea what this story was about. I just started it, because I read everything Colleen Hoover writes. No. I don't just read her stories. I drink them down and dwell inside them. She creates characters and worlds that cling to you, that make you face all your hopes and fears, that put you through the full range of emotions.

Anyway, long story short, I was completely unprepared for how a book with such a pretty cover could contain such ugliness, pain, and suffering. I mean, the destroyed flower probably should have been a warning sign . . . Regardless, it's still a gorgeous story, in the kind of way the embers of a fire are beautiful, after the flames have just destroyed something.

Be sure to read the author's note at the end of the story.

Pushing the Limits Series by Katie McGarry

Pushing the Limits by Katie McGarry
My rating: 5 of 5 stars

#BecRereads2018

Katie McGarry is an Author Goddess. She writes words that wrap me up inside so tight that I don't care about the world going on around me. Her characters are complex and layered. Her storylines are interesting and so effective. She takes every emotion I have and forces me to feel it at max volume. It melts my face off, and I love it.

This is my 2nd time through this book, and I'm still stunned by this story.

Book 309 read in 2018

Pages: 392

PREVIOUS REVIEW:
It's emotionally gut-wrenching in the cry so many tears the page gets blurry kind of way. The characters are complex and well-developed. The storyline is fascinating and fast-paced. The voice is good, the writing admirable, and I love the alternating POVs.

---

Dare You To by Katie McGarry
My rating: 5 of 5 stars

#BecRereads2018

I'm really glad I decided to revisit this series, because it has so many things I enjoy in a good story. The characters are complex, well-developed, and show a lot of growth. There is a school counselor who is interesting and quirky and does a whole lot to help these teens with their struggles. The parents are all flawed individuals, who also don't make the best choices, so that's a recurring theme that continues to be interesting.

They're also romantic in a realistic, believable sort of way, and Katie McGarry is a phenomenal storyteller. I'd read the sports pages, if she'd write them (not that I get a newspaper, I don't, because this is 2018).

Book 310 read in 2018

Pages:456

---

Crash into You by Katie McGarry
My rating: 5 of 5 stars

#BecRereads2018

I don't know how many of you had a moment in your teenage years, or maybe even early 20s, where you realize your parents are more screwed up than you are (or than you ever even understood). If you did, then you'll relate to this series on a whole different level, because it showcases a lot of flawed and complicated family relationships, which make the stories more interesting, though often more painful.

Isaiah is a delicious book boyfriend, even if he sometimes needs to dial down the overprotective vibe. And watching Rachel deal with her anxiety and panic attacks, and/or not deal with them, added another layer of concern to the story.

I definitely still appreciate the pro-therapy/counseling message of this series.

Book 311 read in 2018

Pages: 474

PREVIOUS REVIEW:
I'm so upset that this story ended. I can't even talk about it right now. I just wanted to stay in the world for as long as possible, and now I'm kicked back out of it and devastated. Boo on reality. This is going to be an ugly book hangover.

---

Take Me On by Katie McGarry
My rating: 5 of 5 stars

#BecRereads2018

There were so many characters in this story on their own difficult journeys. Every person in the story has a purpose, and every major side character is developed well enough that you really get invested in everyone, not just the main couple.

This is the story of a boy who can't stop fighting everyone and everything, and a girl who did nothing but fight and now never wants to fight again.

Book 312 read in 2018

Pages: 544

PREVIOUS REVIEW:
Don't love fighting. Do love this book. Katie McGarry writes flawed characters who are so lovable I hate when our time together ends.

View all my reviews

Leo by Mia Sheridan

Leo by Mia Sheridan
My rating: 3 of 5 stars

I enjoyed this book, but I just don't like that she all of the sudden falls hard enough for him that she trusts him so much to give him every part of her. With out even knowing anything about her past. With her past, this isn't something that you would think she would just all of the sudden open her self up to someone that she didn't even ask any questions about. I gave this low stars because I just am not believing that she could open her self up to a stranger so fast after being so closed off for so long.  214 Pages

Water for Elephants by Sara Gruen

Water for Elephants by Sara Gruen
My rating: 5 of 5 stars

Confession 1: I avoided this book for years, because everyone else convinced me it was going to be absolutely depressing.

Okay, so it's not an easy read. I get that, but I thought this was so beautiful. It plays with the idea people have that if they would just be brave enough to run away with the circus, then maybe their lives would be more exciting and colorful. This world is definitely more exciting and colorful, but that comes with a lot of hardship, ugliness, selfishness, and manipulation. We get to see those two play out against each other throughout the story, and I think that's why this story captivated me.

Confession 2: It wasn't at all what I expected.

This isn't a relaxing read, and so many things about it made me frustrated and angry. But it made me feel so many different emotions and imagine so many different ways of life. The characters drew me into their small worlds, and it often broke my heart the way so many of their lives were confined to the small boxes they had accepted for themselves, despite having "run away with the circus." I like the contrast of past and present, even when it depressed me.

Confession 3: I would never read this one again, but I'm glad that I took this strange journey.

Book 272 read in 2018

Pages: 335

Bright Side Series by Kim Holden

Gus by Kim Holden (Book 2)
My rating: 5 of 5 stars

This was difficult at first, as Gus worked through his grief, but it then became a heartfelt story about rebuilding your life after loss and trauma. Gus is wow, but I almost enjoyed Scout more. She had a hard time finding her strength, but it was always there, which made her a fascinating character who showed a lot of growth throughout the story.

Book 245 read in 2018

Pages: 389

---

Franco by Kim Holden (Book 3)
My rating: 5 of 5 stars

I wasn't sure if I could love this one at first, because it's a big change from stories that primarily revolved around Bright Side. However, the longer I read it, the more I loved it. Franco is fantastic. This book has a lot of humor and warmth, which was needed after all the tragedy and drama of the previous books.

That's not to say there is no hardship experienced in this story, because there is. But you leave it feeling refreshed, instead of crushed.

Book 246 read in 2018

Pages: 207

Nova Series by Jessica Sorensen

Breaking Nova by Jessica Sorensen (224 Pages) Nova and Quinton are both holding on to what happened to them a couple years ago. They start to pull each other out of the slump that they have been stuck in. This a completely different type of love story… I am excited to see how their story keeps moving forward.

Saving Quinton by Jessica Sorensen (384 Pages) This book… just is so deep and makes you get a clear view of what struggles some people go through. Nova tries so hard to help Quinton pull himself out of the mess that he finds himself in. Nova has to leave and hope that Quinton can pull himself out on his own because Nova can’t keep fighting to save him.

Nova and Quinton by Jessica Sorensen (384 Pages) Quinton and Nova keep moving forward on figuring out their relationship. Quinton finds that he wants to turn back to his bad habits but Nova is the one to pull him out.

Hell and Back

Hell and Back by Natasha Madison
My rating: 5 of 5 stars

I enjoyed this book a lot even though there is a hard story behind Bella past. It is very hard to hear about the stuff that Bella and her daughter Lilah went through in the past. There are two twists in this story, one of them I was able to see coming but the other was a shocker. 

View all my reviews

350 Pages

Sugar by Deirdre Riordan Hall

Sugar by Deirdre Riordan Hall
My rating: 4 of 5 stars

This is very upsetting, until the point where it becomes EVEN MORE UPSETTING.

This is the story of an obese teen who grows up in an extremely abusive situation. I spent 50% of the book mentally pleading with the MC to run away. RUN AWAY, SUGAR, JUST RUN AWAY.

I desperately wanted her to flee the terrible situation, because I couldn't take reading about it. This is something I normally wouldn't advocate for with a teen, as even though it seems like nothing can be worse than staying in a terrible situation, the reality is that things usually can get worse for young runaways. But the heart wants what the heart wants.

Also, did I mention there's an EVEN MORE UPSETTING thing that you should prepare yourself for? Unfortunately, it was something Sugar couldn't have even run away from. Life came and just gave her another big punch in the gut, as if she wasn't able to become who she would be without hitting rock bottom. That's why this gets 4 stars, instead of 5, as I don't love the whole, take everything away from the MC, in order for her to become her best self mentality. I think people can become their best self with a little love and support, too. But overall, it's a good read if you don't mind being depressed throughout, with small flashes of beauty and hope.

Book 182 read in 2018

Pages: 276

Hillbilly Elegy: A Memoir of a Family and Culture in Crisis by J.D. Vance

Hillbilly Elegy: A Memoir of a Family and Culture in Crisis by J.D. Vance
My rating: 4 of 5 stars

This is a good look at poverty and violence, and the struggle it is to grow up inside them and to then try to make a life outside of them. It's a lot about class, community culture, and the persistent trauma of growing up inside a culture of constant stress and drama. Honestly, this hits very close to home, even in Missouri, and I know many people who grew up in such a way or are still trapped and impacted by similar childhoods.

My brother said this was a boring book, because it's everything he already knows about the impacts of growing up in poverty and despair. In fact, his exact words were, "I thought it was boring and not that good, but we grew up in a poor area, so it wasn't anything groundbreaking."

This had me thinking about why my brother would expect a book about a culture in crisis to be groundbreaking. Does he feel as if there is some kind of reason or solution to poverty and violence that he does not yet know about? And why doesn't he want to see the reality of some of our life experiences reflected back in his literature?

My mother said, "It is suited to those who have always had advantages and money and don't understand those who haven't."

Now, on some level, I understand her comment, because she's suggesting that the value of the book may be in its shock value for all of those who haven't grown up in or surrounded by some level of poverty and hardship. But who in the world are these people? And what world do they live in that I don't? How many

Without Merit by Colleen Hoover

Without Merit by Colleen Hoover
My rating: 4 of 5 stars

This was a good story overall, and I read it straight through. However, it's my least favorite Colleen Hoover book and the only one I'm not sure I would ever reread. Now, this isn't meant as an insult, as I obviously still gave the book 4 stars. I just didn't connect with it as well as I have others.

It's a compelling, fast paced read, and it is full of interesting characters, unexpected situations, and a variety of different strained relationships. One minor complaint that I have is that some major/traumatic issues and moments were just brushed over under the philosophy that not all mistakes deserve a consequence. And that's probably true, however it overlooks the fact that even though a mistake might not deserve a consequence, it still may have been harmful and had consequences for others. It may still require more resolution than a mere apology, especially if the mistake went unresolved and unexplained for years and affected the lives of others.

What was fascinating about this book is that it dealt with the amount of harm that people can do to the ones they love when they fail to successfully communicate, whether that's through being the one to speak up, or being the one to actively and patiently listen without judgment. The characters definitely learn a lot across the length of the story, so that was interesting, even when it was uncomfortable.

There's a lot of the drama, and obviously some of the drama is there to keep the plot moving forward. I get that, but it did make some of the drama seem unnecessary, like overkill. The story just didn't sit as well inside the drama as I wanted, I guess.

Overall, I still enjoyed the story enough that I stayed up until 3 AM on a work night to finish it. It's well-written as is everything that comes from CoHo. I'm happy I read it, even if it won't be one that I return to.

Pages: 384

It Ends with Us by Colleen Hoover

It Ends with Us by Colleen Hoover
My rating: 5 of 5 stars

*expletives redacted*

I had no idea what this story was about. I just started it, because I read everything Colleen Hoover writes. No. I don't just read her stories. I drink them down and dwell inside them. She creates characters and worlds that cling to you, that make you face all your hopes and fears, that put you through the full range of emotions.

Anyway, long story short, I was completely unprepared for how a book with such a pretty cover could contain such ugliness, pain, and suffering. I mean, the destroyed flower probably should have been a warning sign . . . Regardless, it's still a gorgeous story, in the kind of way the embers of a fire are beautiful, after the flames have just destroyed something.

Be sure to read the author's note at the end of the story.

Pages: 376

"Healing Jacob" by Nicole Stewart

This angsty romance between a homeless musician and a bakery owner fell flat for me.  Neither main character was three dimensional, and I couldn't invest myself in their story.  The misuse of commas was distracting.  I think the writer has potential, and a good editor could have helped with the flow of the story and fleshing out the characters.  166 pages (Kindle edition).

"Absolution" by Sloane Kennedy

This is book one in The Protectors Series and deals with three men who've all suffered some form of trauma.  Jonas was kicked out of his home at age 14 for being gay and spent several years as a teenage prostitute before having even more tragedy befall him.  Mace's son was kidnapped and murdered by a killer.  Cole faced the traumas of war before losing his sister, who was Jonah's best friend.  Now someone has hired Mace to kill Jonah for bogus reasons, and Cole gets involved.  This novel was full of angst and heavy and was not quite believable at times, but it was a compelling story.  356 pages (Kindle edition.)

An Indigenous Peoples' History of the United States by Roxanne Dunbar-Ortiz

(Posted for Paul Mathews)

This covers U.S. history over the years against Native Americans with destruction of whole societies and misuse of Indian funds. In the 50s and 60s there were relocation centers. In 1972, a meeting of 75 nations was locked in a fed building with all the information about the years of extermination of Indian tribes by the U.S. government.  They read it and published it.

Audio:  11 hrs. 22 min.

Print:  312 pages

Stick by Andrew Smith

Stick by Andrew Smith
My rating: 5 of 5 stars

I need a hug.

And I love Andrew Smith, because the way he writes is so insanely honest that I always connect with his stories, whether they're straightforward and more serious, like this, or bizarre and stylized like Grasshopper Jungle.

He writes characters who carve holes inside my chest, then take up residence in the empty spaces.

Pages: 320

"Winter Ball" by Amy Lane

This is another good story about two close friends who become lovers much to their surprise.  Skipper Keith coaches a rec league soccer team when he's not working the help desk at a tech company.  Richie Scoggins is his best friend, star player on the team, and works in his father's junkyard.   Both men are unhappy at their jobs; Richie stays at his due to guilt from his father.  Skipper stays at his because he doesn't know what else to do.  There are lots of secondary characters who change the men's lives for better and for worse.  I really liked this book and how it described each man's acceptance of being gay.  200 pages (Kindle edition).

"Shot Through the Heart" by CJ Bishop

Although this is the first book in the Cowboy Gangster series, it is built off of a different series, which I have not read.  I figured as much while I was reading it since so many other characters who were not in the story were mentioned and played integral parts.  This book focused on Axel Anders a 22-year-old man who's suffering from PTSD after being gang raped by his brother and three other evil men.  Clint Maddox, the "cowboy gangster," feels very protective of Axel after meeting him through Axel's (good) stepbrother, Angel.  Clint is a cold-hearted enforcer for the Sanitini family and is surprised by these feelings.  The book basically deals with both men tentatively growing closer with lots of flashbacks to awful events in their lives.  It was quite a roller coaster ride.  And there was a cute puppy.  295 pages (Kindle edition).

"Off Campus" by Amy Jo Cousins

This first book in the Bend or Break series centers on Tom Worthington, who is returning to college after taking time off to deal with the revelation that his father has been running a ponzi scheme.  He's been gypsy-cabbing for cash in Boston and sleeping in his car.  Now that he has enough money to live in the older student dorm, he's surprised to find that he has a roommate, and the roommate hates him at first sight.  Reese Anders is technically too young for this dorm, but he was brutally bullied by jocks during his freshman year, and he's been separated for his safety.  Unfortunately, Tom was once a college jock, and Reese will do just about anything to get him to leave.

Poor Reese and Tom have both been through very tough times, although in vastly different circumstances.  Their interactions are tense, funny, and uncomfortable but evolve into a grudging friendship.  However, Tom's ongoing money problems and Reese's continued harassment by his tormentors threaten to push them both over the edge.  Will they bend or break?  314 pages (Kindle edition).